Photos by Briana Lindsey Photography

You know how everyone says that their love for their children gets stronger and stronger with time? It's a feeling that seems so impossible each and every day. Like how can I possibly love Ava any more than I do now? But then it happens. It just happens. My love for her grows stronger with time and it's just a feeling you can't put into words.

Well you know what else seems to be growing with time?

Tantrums.

And these past two weeks have been pretty much a nightmare on the parenting front.

Everyone always says that the thing we call the "terrible twos" actually happens to most kids in their threes. Never have I ever heard someone say it happened in the one's but here in our house, the terrible one's are in full force and I'm about at my breaking point.

And I'm totally at a loss.

One minute she's happy as can be and the next, she's screaming and crying for no reason at all. Literally no reason at all, at least that I can tell. She'll scream at the top of her lungs, fake cry the most frustrating high-pitched, forced fake cry sound I've ever heard and it'll last what seems like an eternity. And in those moments, I just don't know what to do.

I try to console her with words and she screams louder.
I try to hug her and kiss her and she pushes me away.
I walk away to give her space and she starts crying real tears on top of the screaming.
I try to nurse her and she doesn't want it.

Now, there's one thing that works every single time but it's the one thing I currently despise the most in life right now.

YouTube

If I give her YouTube, she stops crying immediately. And I'll admit, I've done it for my own sanity. But I know that in the long run, I'm only making it harder on myself. I don't want her to think that YouTube is the answer to everything and I don't want her to think that she gets what she wants because she's throwing a toddler tantrum.

So really, I need help. I need advice. I need well wishes and prayers and anything you can send my way.

How did you deal with the terrible twos? How did you balance your own sanity and caving in vs standing strong and just dealing with the "screaming at the top of her lungs" tantrums in the middle of the grocery store?

Help. Just help.