Raising a boy in this world terrifies me.

Raising a boy up in this world scares me. It terrifies me and I’ll tell you why. 

Last week on my 19 Weeks Pregnant update I mentioned how I know nothing about being a boy mom. I think I’m a pretty great girl mom and even though I’ll be a second time mom this time around, I have no clue where to even start with a boy. 

I got all sorts of advice — cover him up when you’re changing those diapers so you don’t get peed on, don’t buy any new white stuff, be prepared for lots of climbing and jumping and craziness and the comment I got the most? Boys love their mamas. And my goodness reading this over and over made my heart just so happy. I know I’ll do just fine because I made it through with Ava but I just needed a little encouragement - I wanted to know what to expect.

All of that is craziness I’m told to expect isn’t what I’m talking about here. I’m not worried about any of that in the least. 

I’m worried about bringing up a boy in this world. It scares me. It terrifies me.

Now I’m not one to get political on here so that’s definitely not where I’m headed, but we all know that there is a lot of “gender divide” in our society right now, for lack of a better term. We all see the headlines of both boys and men doing bad things, terrible things and just unbelievable acts toward women. We see it in person and we see it on the news and it’s all just so terrible. It’s horrible. It’s not the way a women (or men) should have to live — in fear. 

But I’ve got to say — Not all men are bad. Not even “most” men in this world are bad and that is something I truly believe. But when I see men being accused of these terrible acts every single day of my life, it scares me. It scares me that my little man will be categorized with these “men” as he grows and matures. My little guy will one day be a man and he, too, will be put into this group of people who are constantly being accused of just horrendous things every single day. 

Now I’ll never know the truth about all of these stories we see in the media — Did it all happen? Did it not happen? Are the men in these stories lying or are they truly innocent? Are the women lying in some of these situations to “get back” at men in their past? For fame? For money? Or are they telling the absolute truth? 

I wholeheartedly believe that there’s a bit of both. There are two sides to every story so someone’s gotta be lying and I can guarantee it is NOT always the man. It’s just not. 

And for the women who have endured these things: I cannot even imagine the bravery it takes to accuse a man of such acts. It’s something I cannot even fathom. You’re all so strong and you’re all so brave and you’re heroes for stopping these men from doing to others what they’ve done to you. (Or the other way around — women to men)

But just like men, there are also terrible women in this world. There are women who will manipulate and accuse and lie, for whatever reason, and that, too, is just a fact. 

I’m going to raise my boy up to the man I want him to be. I will teach him what’s right and teach him what’s wrong. I’ll teach him our family beliefs and I’ll teach him to respect all women and respect all men. But even if I’m able to do all of that and my little man grows up to be the most honorable, respectful, hard working, truthful, honest, great human being that I expect him to be, you just never know who he’ll encounter and what he “could be” accused of. 

I’ve seen it — Men accused of acts that are later proven, without a doubt, to be lies. And it goes both ways for men and for women. But in the current state of our society, bringing up a man just scares me. We’re constantly categorizing people [genders, ages, races, nations] into big groups and right now, I believe that men have it rough. At least the good men in this world have it rough as they’re being placed into very general category. 

So bringing a little man up in this world scares me, no matter how much I know that I’ll do a great job of raising him. But I guess that’s all I can do — make sure he’s respectful and truthful and honest and kind. All I can do is raise an honorable young man that our society is proud to have as one of their own.